Just a little update, Me and Allen broke up actually some weeks ago but dont want to put it here until i finally ready to talk about it. Well this is life. There are some things which are not really meant to be no matter how hard we tried to save our relationship... i guess love is not enough in order for a relationship to survived. Sure love is very essential, it is the core heart of a relationship but there's more than that... He feel like he was dragging me down which is true, Hes' been suffering something which i cannot put it here coz its private, its not that i dont love him much thats why i choose to broke up with him its just that~~~ i cannot explained it but i am sure he knows that no matter what he will always stay in my heart. He's been so good to me the sweetest man I ever had. .. anyways this is my life journey and whatever it is at the end of the road, i am excited to find out.
God is really great!! in my latest blog entry i posted that i prayed and asked God something which is really special and guess what? He answered my prayer today!!!! Thank you God! I dont know what i did to you that you are so good to me.. u always gave me whatever i asked you. THANK YOU THANK YOU!! im so happy seriously ;=) I remember my favorite quote from my ever favorite author Paulo Coelho which state that "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it"this is really true because it seems like whatever i want in life in which i really wanted with all my heart is all coming true..u just have to believe it and God and the whole universe will gave that to you.
LAst March 24, 2011 my angel Vinnerie just graduated from Nursery with flying colors!! yep yep yep u heard it right!She is so smart just like me LOL..and she is very talented i am so thankful God gave me a daughter like her.I can never ask for more.
Maybe one of the reason why i am happy because i dont have any anger towards anyone. TO those people who hurt me in the past i already forgiven them and guess what? Life worth living when u have a pure and forgiving heart. Just months ago i really hated someone, i even cursed him.. 3 weeks ago we started communicating, he said sorry and i forgive him and thats the start of our beautiful FRIENDSHIP. He listens to me and gave advices, he is not a bad person i used to think.. he is actually very nice person and a very good friend. I'm happy with whats going on with his life now.
This photo is taken today at the prayer room in San Pedro Cathedral, Davao City
Life is really like a wheel..sometimes you are on the top and sometimes down. Things these past days is not that pleasant compare to the last days.. I dont want to elaborate things because there are things which i want to keep it to myself but there's only one thing i can say.. "LOTS OF CONFUSION"
And today i ask the guidance and peace of my mind to my creator..to help me deal with what is happening to me right now. Things are really complicated.I prayed in the prayer room for hours!!imagine..hours..but i did not even realized that i spent so much time there! i was talking to God..and i guess i was carried away by our conversation.. of all the things that i've been dying to tell HIM, to ask HIM that when i came out the prayer room it was almost dark.
Although im the type of girl who always asked God for guidance but this time its different..because i did not only asked for guidance but i asked Him something really special..I've been asking him the same thing for the past 3 weeks now..Oh God please hear my prayer! Pleaseeeee...
ok so i dont know what to write anymore.. i just really hope God will answer my prayer..but if not then i am sure there is a reason for everything and another lesson learned! Please Lord i just want peace of mind to every person involved and i hope whatever the decision maybe it will be for the good of everyone. I love you God! and thank you for everything!
i found a video in facebook about love pain and letting go and the message struck me because i can relate to it. The message is written in Filipino and i translate it in english so everybody understands. When u read this please listen to the background music i set for my blog because thats the exact video that i am talking about. So here is the translation.
Traffic Lights (Written by Sarene Cas)
Love is like a traffic light, there are three colors which becomes a guide for us to know when to stop, to let go, and to take action.
Loving someone so much doesn’t always mean they’re the right one for us.Loving someone doesnt always lead you to a happy ending… because true love never ends…
There are times when you would feel the pain brought by your love.It’s painful to think that there are persons who don’t know how to treasure the ones who love them.
It’s better to accept the fact that you are not appreciated than to insist yourself to someone who never sees your worth. ’till you keep on loving that person, the more you’d get hurt.
You are afraid to accept the reality…that the person you love is blind to see how much you love him/her…
Loving that person doesn’t really mean that he’s/she’s the one for you…You are afraid to lose the one you love so much…But, is he/she too afraid that he’d/she’d lose you?
Letting go doesn’t mean giving up, but rather accepting that there are things that cannot be. There are things in the world that are not meant for us. The things that we yearn so much to have… could be the very things that we could never have…
You need to learn to ‘let go’ so that we can move on and get over the pains of the past. Loving someone…is setting them free… letting them go…Yes… for someone like you who loves…You might say.. ‘Never say goodbye because goodbye means going away..And going away means forgetting…’To let go is not to deny but to accept… The hardest thing to do is letting go…not because you want to…but because you have to…
There are people who will come in our lives to lift us up from the agonies of the past…Let us not close our heart because we got our hearts broken before..Just remember there is a person who is ready to mend our broken heart and enter our life
While someone breaks your heart, someone else is waiting to fix it…Proceed with caution. ‘Careful forethought to avoid danger or harm…We were afraid to get hurt…We were afraid to face what could happen…We were afraid to love again…That’s why… the word ‘courage’ became famous…‘Coz that’s what we need to take action…If the traffic light has a yellow light for ‘caution’…It’s the same in loving…if we know that we’d just get hurt and not meant to take the lead…Then..Let’s not wear ourselves out…
Let’s not force ourselves to fit in, in an elevator that doesn’t have space left..Let’s not force ourselves in…There’s a ladder for us to use, we just don’t want to notice it…
just had one of my luckiest day today! guess what? so many good things happened..ok ok im going to enumerate them..
1. I have the love of my life which loves me and i love him back so much as well, he never fails to send me sms everyday and email..he's so sweet i so love Allen! i feel like im floating when we're talking just the look of his eyes melts my heart away..baby you just dont know how much i love you and you dont know i have a blog too! its better this way so i can write anything i want without hesitations.
2. I went to the Students Account Office this morning to let them assess my account, i need to pay my tuition fee so i can take the final examination, when the operator handed me the assessment of my account i was shocked! I said to him "are you sure you are correct?.. He said "yes ma'am thats correct" I looked at my assessment with jaw opened..somebody was paid my tuition pay! and i dont have to pay for anything no more!! i was like omg!! Anyways im not really wondering who paid my account i already have someone in my mind, Vincent--the father of my daughter. he's been paying for it eversince without telling me, i already talked to him about this but he feels like it's his obligation to do it. I told him its not necessary but he insist..well who am i to say no? I called him and say thank you. He's always like that anyways, never fails to surprise me even though its been a long time we're not together. He just felt GUILTY i guess for all the things that he did to me before thats why he tried his best to help me as much as he can.
3. I was really thinking i have an "incomplete grade" in my 4 subjects i took last term because i was not able to take the 1st exam but then today i found out i have a grade which is above average! so now that i have a grade in these 4 subjects i dont have to look for the professors and ask them to let me take special examination. oh God you are sooo great Lord! thank you!!
4. My evaluation on my teaching demonstration last week was excellent; above average, infact im one of the highest according to the principal yay!!!
5.I was not able to study last night coz i was out with friends and guessss what?? our examination is all ESSAY and i soooo love it! wooaahhhh i am so glad its not enumeration and identification!
6. when i came home my sweet angel Vinnerie is there kissing me and hugging me and telling me she loves me..wow!! this is life!!!
1.) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
2.) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
3.) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
4.)Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
5.)Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men.. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)
6.) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
7..)Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say
8.)Whatever : Is a women's way of saying F** K YOU!
9.)Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself.. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3.Then you RUN!
so, valentines day was over and maybe some of you are wondering what i got on valentines day, do i have a date?.. did someone gave me a bouquet of flowers? mmmmm....
Feb.13 i had dinner date with some of my closest friends in high school Queng and Sitti. Its been a long time i havent seen them and i am very happy to see them again.
WOw, we've changed a lot, before when we were in high school, we talked on boys, make ups, celebrities and other nonsense stuff but now its really different, we talked about life, work, business, work, relationship, marriage and parenthood, sure we matured a lot.
Queng had her own Review center for nurses and is doing great, Sitti landed in a nice job with good position she was able to buy her own car recently and what about me?.. mmm well as what everybody knows im trying my best and i guess i am really a lucky girl, was living on my own, had the noblest job with enough salary to pay the bills, buy food clothing etc. My plans on studying my masters in Australia is very clear now, i choose new castle university and right after my graduation this october ill be taking the scholarship examination of new castle and im crossing my fingers.
February 14 i dont have a date because we were in my grandparents place to celebrate the 1st year death anniversary of my grandmother although there is a certain guy back in my city who always asking me to go out but i refused him for the reason that i am not still ready to go on dates. I promised myself i will not go to dates nor entertain someone until april this year.. and you asked me why april? i choose not to say it ;=)
oh God, its been so long since i did write my blog and i miss it sooo much! i deleted all my entries since 2009 and i really regret for doing it. I've been blogging for more than 2 years and with just one click of a finger it has all disappeared, I dont know what to write in my blog right this moment.. will u updated if im not busy